Opening And The Weight Of Leadership

Ty Cobb Backer 0:00

If we have a kind of building system that either one of those two up, we're going to push you out. I don't want to do it around five other people that are pushing themselves to succeed. That isn't about focus, but giving value first. Compensation follows contribute always. This is true. Authenticity. It's the truth. Every use, this is our story. We share with you our journey. We share with you our stars. Please welcome your host, Ty Cobb Backer. And we are live. Welcome back, everybody. It's behind Tool Belt. Episode 340. l

A Call With Steven Spence

Ty Cobb Backer 0:40

So, as you noticed, the last few weeks have had kind of piggybacked off of each other each week of some of our experiences over the years of leading teams, building teams, building companies, uh, all the good stuff. And I had an opportunity yesterday to to speak to Steven Spence. Vic, Vic, myself, and Steven are pretty close. And I I consider Steven one of one of my good friends, a true friend like Victor, even though I don't get to see Steven as much as I I see Vic, but Steven and I tend to pick up essentially right where we left off. And no sooner I answered the phone, and the first words out of Steven's mouth is I miss you, man. Like he didn't say, hey, what's up? He didn't say, you know, what's going on, or hi Ty. He was just the first thing out of his mouth, he was like, I miss you. And I was like, dude, I miss you too. And the conversation goes on, and and Steven owns a company called Project Mappet. And he gets to deal with a lot of us contractors on many different levels and many different size contractors. They essentially do the same thing as we do. They're all roofing contractors, and he gets to talk to them, you know, all contractors from all over the country. And we were talking about, you know, and he's a business owner too. So we were talking about, you know, the pressure and the stress and decisions and stuff that he has to make. And he's listening to the contractors and the decisions that that they have to make. And and so it fit right into where our conversations have been. And and Vic Vic has been helping me with some of these topics too, and which is pretty cool because this isn't just me necessarily pulling shit out of my ass, but this is the stuff that Vic gets to experience with me in you know leading teams and and things like that. So we're not only am I like throwing my spin on it and sugarcoating it, but Vic Vic is helping me navigate through a lot of this, but also gets to witness witness me and us go through a lot of

What To Do Without Answers

Ty Cobb Backer 3:16

this stuff. So so today, you know, I I want to talk about something that all of us experience, but very few openly discuss. You know, what do we do when we don't have all the answers? You know, whether we're parents, whether we're, you know, leaders, managers, you know, it it doesn't, it doesn't matter. You know, if you're if you're trying to manage yourself, you know, which is difficult enough, you know, but what do you what do you do when you don't have all the answers? You know, and as as leaders, we often feel this pressure that we're supposed to know everything, that that we should have every solution, every plan, every prediction figured out before anyone asks, you know, our our team members look to us, our customers count on us, our families, you know, depend on us. And sometimes we convince ourselves that admitting uncertainty somehow makes us look weak. You know, and I know I've felt that feeling where I just I feel so powerless, I feel weak, I feel like I've failed, but but but there's something that I've learned, okay, especially over the past couple of years here, where people people aren't looking for a parent or a leader who who has every answer. They're looking for a leader they can trust. Okay, and and there's there's a huge difference, you know, throughout my journey of you know, building companies, leading teams, and even raising our family, I've I've I've had countless, countless, and I mean countless, countl, countless moments where I honestly didn't know what was coming next. Okay, between market change, changes, opportunities disappeared, team members left, new challenges showed up overnight, and and every single time, you know, I had a choice, you know, and a lot of them were were very difficult choices. Some of them were choices I didn't know what to make, and and you know, I had a choice to fight or flight. Pretend that I know everything. Or suit up, I show up, I lead with honesty, confidence, and conviction while we figure it out. And key word is together. Okay, and today I'm gonna I'm gonna try to unpack why I think leaders feel so much pressure to always have the answers and the difference between confidence and certainty. And and why I think saying I don't know can actually strengthen trust and practical ways to continue leading, even when the future isn't completely clear, right? Because because I I think leadership isn't just about it, it isn't just about knowing everything. Okay, it's about helping everyone move forward anyways, okay. And I know I've had to do that for myself. It's like I just I gotta, and we've talked about this, you know, over the past couple of weeks. I just gotta keep taking that that that step forward, you know, and and the pressure, the pressure that that comes with it, you know, like you know, and this is the thing, like where does the idea even come from that that leaders are supposed to have all the answers? And honestly, I think I think a lot of it comes from watching too much damn TV, right? Like we grow up seeing leaders portrayed as as decisive, all-knowing figures, the boss who walks in and fixes everything, and the parent who always knows what to do, or the CEO who predicts the future. And I, you know, I I have pretty good intuition, and and I'll be honest with you, I was on a stretch there for a minute where yeah, I felt like I could, I was a pretty good predictor of of what the future holds. And that, you know, like I said last week, then and Mike Tyson says everybody's got a plan until they get punched in the mouth, right? And it's like it's like then we step into like this leadership role, okay, real life roles, okay. And and we carry that expectation that we need to know everything with us. And and we think, we think if we don't have all the answers, I'm failing. Okay, I don't know how many times, you know, I may not have been able to identify that feeling that I actually had, but that's what it comes down to, like the fear of failing. Okay, but but here's the truth. Okay, here's here's here's the honest truth. Okay, nobody knows everything. Okay, not the most successful entrepreneurs, not the most experienced managers, not the best parents. Okay, the difference, the difference is that great leaders don't pretend they do in real world practices. Okay, we understand that leadership isn't about certainty, it's about direction. Okay, and and let me say let me say that again. Leadership isn't about certainty, it's about direction. Okay, you don't need to know exactly how everything is going to play out, okay. We we just need to know where we're trying to go and be willing to take the next step, okay. Willingness, okay, and that brings us to something that that I think is is is really important.

Confidence Versus Certainty

Ty Cobb Backer 9:56

The difference between confidence and certainty. Okay, certainty, certainty says I know exactly what's gonna happen, okay. And confidence says, I don't know exactly what's gonna happen, okay, but I trust that we'll figure it out. Okay, and key word again, we okay. There there are two different those are two different mindsets. Certainty, I believe, is often an illusion, okay and confidence is the choice, and people people believe it or not, can can feel the difference. Okay when a leader pretends to be certain, but isn't it creates indecisiveness, it creates like a like like a tension, it it creates doubt. Okay, I've seen it, I've watched it. People start to question what's real and what's not. But when a leader is confident, even in uncertain in uncertain times, it creates stability. Okay. That's right, Ben. Okay, it could right. Exactly. You know, but but we may not have all the answers, but we're not lost. Okay. And that's powerful. That for for me, that's a powerful statement. And we have we've had we've had a time in my business where things shifted. I mean, almost overnight. We had a plan, we had momentum, and then suddenly the plan changed, and everything we thought new didn't apply anymore. Okay, my team looked at me, okay, essentially, said, what do we do now? You know, and I don't think anybody actually came to me and asked me that. Well, no, maybe yeah, maybe they did. And I had a choice, okay. I could make something up, I could pretend that I had a perfect plan, or I could just be honest. So told them, okay, and I remember have actually I remember having this conversation with Glenn and I believe Baker. Like, I don't have all the answers right now, but I do know this. I know that we're going to figure it out together, we're gonna stay focused, we're going to adapt, and we're going to keep moving forward. We always move forward, and you know, you want to know what happened. Instead of losing confidence in me, they leaned in, okay? Because honesty builds trust, okay. Being vulnerable like that, and trust is the foundation, it is the foundation of leadership. So I'm gonna talk about that for a minute. Why does saying I don't know actually strengthen trust? Well, from my experience, okay, it shows authenticity. People people don't expect perfection, they expect honesty, okay. When we admit when we admit we don't have all the answers, you're showing that we're human, we're showing that we're real, and that makes us relatable, okay. But but but here's the key, okay. You can't just say I don't know and stop there. I've done that, I don't know, and turn around and walk out of the room and figure it out. I have to follow it with direction, okay. Whether it's the right direction or not, I know because I've made enough decisions that we will figure it out along the way. I don't know, but here's what we're going to do next. Okay. I don't know, but but this is what we're going to focus on. Okay. I don't know, but I'm committed to finding out. Okay. And that's leadership. That it that's leadership 101. That's leadership in a nutshell. It's not about having all the answers, it's about creating clarity in the middle of uncertainty. Okay.

A Practical Playbook For Unclear Times

Ty Cobb Backer 15:20

So how do you actually do that? Okay. First, the first thing, okay, that that I've that I try to do is is focus on what do I know? Okay. What what what are the facts? Right. I just talked to Ben. There was a little bit of a situation. Now, fortunately, we've built leadership depth, where I don't necessarily have to have all the answers and the solutions anymore. And that's probably a different topic for, and I've touched on it over the past couple of weeks, having having leadership depth and and enough people on the bench that I don't have to make all the decisions. And that's the beautiful thing about this is that I don't. I don't I don't necessarily have to make the decisions. I get I have a great, amazing frickin' team that can solve problems on their own, and usually they're the right, that's the right solution. So, anyhow. So, first thing is is find out what what are the facts. Okay. Even in uncertain situations, there's always things that are clear. Okay. And to keep it simple, right? Well, and I could tell you right now the decisions that Ben made without me earlier today was that he stuck to our values, he stuck to our mission, and he stuck to our priorities, right? He anchored himself to those to make his decision on what the next right move is. Okay. So I know that's working. Second thing is we need to communicate consistently. When shit starts hitting the fan, I can't run, I can't hide. I've been communicating, okay, with Glenn on five, eight, twelve times a day. I see her all day. Communication is key. When things are unclear, silence creates fear. Okay, so I know I need to be readily available. I know I need to be consistent. Steady Eddie, steady eddie. All right, because if I'm not, if I don't, okay, communicating, people start, I guess, people start filling in the gaps with like worst-case scenarios. So even if you don't have all the answers, keep communicating. Okay. I gotta let our team know like what's happening. Let them let them know, you know, what what I'm thinking. And then I have to let them know what the next steps are gonna be. Okay, because as we continue to keep stepping forward, more things start to become clearer. Okay, and that's the important thing. If I just stay stuck, okay, nothing becomes clear. Okay, fear starts to manifest. Fear, and then when you start manifesting, the only thing that that I can identify are the worst-case scenarios when I move myself into that mindset. But if I can remove myself from being stuck and start taking the steps towards solutions, clarity, okay, then my mind starts to fixate and only see opportunity, solutions, and corrections to fix that issue. Okay, and the third thing that I've learned too is that the sooner I involve my team, okay, the more I get outside perspective on the solution. Okay, so I gotta involve my team. I don't have to figure out everything on my own. Okay. In fact, I shouldn't. Okay, and some of the best ideas come, came, came from collaboration. Okay, so so ask questions, get input, create an environment, okay, because I feel like we have created an environment where people feel comfortable contributing, okay. And and I would say the fourth thing, and I've touched on it, is is take action. Okay, uncertainty can lead to becoming paralyzed if I let it. Okay, but but progress doesn't require perfect information. Okay, and I think I think a lot of us get stuck until we get like that perfect information, that perfect solution. No, it requires movement, it requires the next step. Learn from it, adjust and keep going, okay. And then finally, I have to trust myself. You have to trust yourself. We're in this position, okay, for a reason. We've made decisions before, we've navigated challenges before. And I say the I say this to myself, and I have to repeat it sometimes. Like I've been here before, I've been in worse, worse situations before, and we've navigated. And again, key word, we've navigated through this. We don't need to know everything, we just need to trust that we can handle what comes next. Okay, and I know it's hard. It's hard to have faith, you know, but I know this for sure that I don't have to go through this by myself, that I have an amazing team that will help push us through just about damn damn near anything. So so if you're listening to this right now and you're in a season, okay, because it's terrifying. We don't want anybody to think that we're failing, okay. So if you're listening to this right now and you're in a season where you don't have all the answers, I want you to hear this. Okay. I want you to hear this. You're not alone, you're not failing. You're leading, okay? Because leadership isn't about having a perfect roadmap. Dude, I never had a perfect roadmap. It's about guiding people through the unknown. So if you have the balls, do it. Or why did you put yourself in this leadership position if you don't have the balls to guide people through uncertain shit? Maybe you should question that. Because it's about showing up, it's about being honest, it's about continuing to move forward even when things are unclear. So the next time you feel that pressure, and I know that pressure, the way of the world pushing down on you, you you know that that the pressure of needing to have all the answers. Take a step back. Remind yourself that your job isn't to know everything, your job is to lead, it's it's to create direction, it's to build trust and keep going. Just keep going. You know, that's what real leadership looks like.

Poll, Prompts, And Final Charge

Ty Cobb Backer 23:03

Okay, so before I forget, Vic, Vic created a poll. Okay, so if you have ever had to lead through a situation where you didn't have all the answers, okay, and the poll would be every day, more than once, not yet. I'm in one right now. What's one decision that you've made delaying because you're waiting for the perfect certainty? Okay. Vic, did you put that up there? Okay. So think about that. Post your shit, you don't have to put it in the comments. Message me. Let's see if we can navigate through this together. Okay. You know, if you have ever had to lead through a situation where you didn't have all the answers, okay, and then what's that one decision you've been delaying because you're waiting for perfect certainty? Okay. And if you enjoyed this show, or if you think there's somebody out there that should listen to this show, please share this with them. And don't forget, okay, to share this with someone. Share, like it, love it, share it, subscribe. I always forget to say that. Subscribe, review it for us, okay. And always remember, keep building, keep growing, and keep leading. And we will see you on the next episode of Behind the Tool Belt.

Speaker 25:00

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