Ty Cobb Backer: 0:00

Hey! And we're back. Most people don't fail because they can't succeed. They fail because they refuse to do the hard stuff.

SPEAKER_01: 0:09

We have a kind of a belief system that either we're gonna push you up, we're gonna push you out.

Ty Cobb Backer: 0:14

I don't want to be around five other people that aren't pushing themselves to succeed. Success isn't about taking, but giving value first.

SPEAKER_01: 0:23

Compensation follows contribution always. This is true authenticity. It's the truth. Every week, this is our story. We share with you our journey, we share with you our scars. Please welcome your host, Tycombacker.

Ty Cobb Backer: 0:36

Welcome back, everybody. Hey, hey, hey. Vic, I love that new intro by the way. Love that stuff. And Zach Fisher, can you hear me now? If you're not in here, you're late. So, anyhow, welcome back, everybody, to Behind the Tool Belt. I'm really glad that everybody's here and I'm glad that we made it. And today is episode 318. And today we're going to talk about something that doesn't usually trend well or sell very easy and doesn't always feel the greatest. But it's the difference between people who stay stuck. Oh, is it loud? Okay. At least they can hear us. At least we're not stuck. Anyhow, we're gonna talk about people um who stay stuck. Ben there did that, and those who actually get unstuck and succeed. So we're gonna not talk about all the fluffy stuff and not the motivational quotes on the wall and not the highlight reels. I want to talk about the uncomfortable stuff, right? The lonely discipline, the the work that doesn't get the applause. You know, and lately, lately a few of us have been working really, really, really, really, really hard on ourselves. Jana, myself, Vic, I think Ben got hemmed up. I haven't talked to him about it yet, but I think he got hemmed up on vacation, which I completely understand on how trying to do the fearless 44 and go on vacation or traveling and all that stuff. I know Vic and I um are seasoned veterans at this. I don't know how many times, and and same with Jana and a few other people. I know Baker and those guys have done it several times and try to encourage people to do it. And most of the things I do already on a day-to-day. So I try to push myself even harder. There's a couple weekends where I was I was calling them the one more weekend where I would do one extra round, one extra rep, and and just do some off-the-wall crazy stuff like like when it snowed here this past this past weekend. I uh opted out of plowing my driveway. I elected to snowblow my entire driveway. And if anybody has ever drove past my house, I don't have a small driveway. Now I did plow it, but it continued to snow, I don't know, 12 hours straight. We ended up getting probably about 12 inches. So there was quite a bit of accumulation. I think it was an inch or two or three per hour, something like that, there for a minute. So my neighbors probably think I'm crazy because I've always snowblowed, blown, snowblow, blown, blown our backyard. And I do the patio and I do the backyard. I expose the grass and all that stuff. And and if you know us, you know we have three smaller dogs. I have a pit bull Jack Russell mix. His name is Jack or the Jack. He is coming up on his 21st birthday. Yes, he is a 20-year-old dog, and and in dog years, I think that's 99. I think he's I think he's about 100 years old. And when you look at him, you can't really tell that he's old that old. I mean, you can look at him and see that he's old, but he still behaves probably like a 12-year-old dog. So that's gonna be a bad day. Anyhow, we have two Boston Terriers. Got uh Cooper and Cooper John, and we have Penny Jean. And Penny Jean is a midget, is a midget Boston Terrier. Like this dog hasn't grown in over two years. I think she's about three years old. Anyhow, they got three-inch tall legs, and they don't like the snow. So I get out back and I I snow blow the backyard and I get all the snow and I expose the patio and stuff like that. So my dogs are more comfortable, and we don't put any salt out back because they get then they get the salt in their paw and all that stuff, anyhow. So I used that as a moment to to work out and push myself and make shit super, super uncomfortable for myself. And unfortunately for myself, being the knucklehead that I am, I couldn't figure out. Of course, now Siri thinks I'm talking to her. I couldn't get my watch to work to keep track of my steps and stuff. And for the life of me, I couldn't. It started pissing me off. So I'm in a race to against my watch and and close my circle. So what I ended up doing is I ended up actually working out for another hour after that. And I tell you what, I did that for for about two days. And I felt it yesterday. And today I really, really, really felt um soreness, you know, pushing, you know, a snowblower and manhandling that thing, and and and just it's it's it's a lot of work, it'll put it on you. So, anyhow, that's that that's it, that's the uncomfortable stuff um that that I put myself through to prepare myself for tougher times to come up to come that are unintentional. So, anyhow, you know, and that's that's that's not flashy. Um and um I wasn't out there giving myself, you know, the the the motivational quotes, but I just I I want to push myself. But um today I want to talk a lot about that stuff. I want to talk about the uncomfortable decisions um that we have to make, the lonely discipline, you know, when when you're by yourself and you have to, you know, motivate yourself to do stuff. But Vic talked about it one day. You know, it's not even about motivation or routines or anything like that. It's about you have to have discipline. Okay, and a lot of that discipline is is is lonely discipline when you're by yourself because to thy own self be true. Okay, um, you're you're only as sick as your secrets. And some of you may know exactly what I'm talking about here, but you know, the work that um you don't get the applause for. Lately, um, you know, like I was mentioning, you know, I'm working, working on myself and and not um necessarily just on like business owner stuff or um, you know, but but being a man, being a husband, being a father, being a leader, and and just just a human being trying to live with intention. And each time I do one of these challenges, I I try to step it up a notch because, like I said, these are basic things. I've conditioned myself to work out, I've conditioned myself to pray, I've conditioned myself to feed my head with good positive messages from the podcast that I listen to, to the books that I read, to um the books that I listen to and the people that I hang out with. So today's today's podcast isn't going to be about ego. And it's not it's not about being tough for just the sake of being tough. Okay. It's about ownership, it's about responsibility, and it's about setting standards for yourself. And and I want to share some of that with you today because this message isn't just for business owners, okay? This is for anyone who wants to grow, improve, and win it life. Okay. So let me let me be straight. Let me be straight about something. Most people don't fail because they can't succeed, they fail because they refuse to do the hard stuff. Everybody wants the results, but nobody wants the process that it takes to be successful. And everybody wants, everybody wants confidence, they want money, they want peace, they want respect. But very few are willing to wake up early, do the uncomfortable stuff, get disciplined, and stop making excuses. Okay. We've been trained to chase comfort, unfortunately. Everything is designed today to make it less, less um difficult, easier, faster. I mean, Amazon has just ruined us. Target delivery, curbside pickup, you know, all these things. I'm not saying it's ruining us and used correctly can definitely make your life a lot easier. But we are trained, you know, to chase that comfort. And comfort is killing potential in today's world. And the truth is, you already know what you need to do, most of us. Okay. We don't need another podcast, we don't need another book, we don't need more motivation, we need standards, we need discipline. You need to do the things that you keep avoiding. And I'm speaking to myself right now. I'm I'm working on all of these things that we're talking about right now. Like I literally sat down and wrote out all these things that I need to work on today. Okay, that I want to continue to keep working on as I want to win at life. And it and really it's just that simple because life, the life that we want, okay, is on the other side of the work that we don't want to do. No fluff, no shortcuts. We're talking about doing the hard stuff no one wants to do. Okay, and here's the lie. Here's the lie that we've been sold. Okay, I'm gonna fill you in on something. If you just if you if you just want the right system, the right shortcut, the right mindset, you won't that that you feel like that you won't have to struggle anymore. Like you're not gonna find it. That's nonsense. Okay. Every meaningful thing in my life today, every breakthrough, every level up, every season of growth came after doing something difficult, came through doing something hard that I didn't want to do, things that I didn't want to do. And most people aren't failing because they don't want to do it, they're failing simply because they don't want to do what they already know. Let that sink in for a minute. Okay, success is boring, can be, success is lonely, success is hard, and you can measure success in many, many different ways. We've talked about that many times. But success starts with working on yourself and winning at life, okay, but it's very boring at times before before it becomes rewarding, okay? And it looks like this for me waking up early, earlier than I want, most days, okay. Saying no when everyone else is saying yes, okay, going out, staying out late, partying, doing whatever crap around the weekends, showing up late for work, being irresponsible, all those things. Doing the work when no one is clapping. Okay. The problem is we live in a world that we celebrate comfort. We reward second place. Okay. And comfort says, this is what it says to us. You deserve a break. You can do it tomorrow.

unknown: 12:45

Okay.

Ty Cobb Backer: 12:45

And listen, rest is important, it's real important. Grace matters for sure. But comfort unchecked becomes complacency. Okay. Been there, did that, have gone through it numerous times over my life and in my career. Okay. Got too comfortable. Things were going too well. Okay. That's usually when shit's getting ready to break. All right. And complacency quietly kills potential in all of us. Vic and I had this conversation yesterday. You know, and personal responsibility changes everything. Everything gets better when you take full responsibility, not partial responsibility, not conditional responsibility, but full responsibility. Okay. There was a time in my life where some, and some of you may know from past episodes or or you just are close to me and know where I had to stop pointing the finger. Okay. And I realized that I had three pointing back. Okay. I had to say, if my business business isn't where I want it to be, that's on me. If my leadership needs to improve, that's on me. If my health, my relationships, or my mindset are off, that's on me. That moment is very uncomfortable when you come to that realization, but it's also freeing. Okay. Because once it's on you, you can actually do something about it. Okay. The hard stuff builds. It builds the person before the results come. Trust me. I've almost quit five minutes before the miracle happened dozens of times. And here's something I really want to share. I want you to hear this. Okay, the hard stuff doesn't just build success, it builds you. It builds discipline, it builds confidence, it builds integrity, it builds self-respect. When you keep those promises to yourself, especially the hard ones, you start trusting yourself. And I want to say in my case, again, I start trusting myself again. Okay. And when you trust yourself, you stop needing motivation, you stop needing validation, you stop needing permission, you move differently, you think differently, you feel differently, you sleep better when you stop breaking those promises that you make to yourself. And I've done it. I've broke so many promises to myself. And and like they start building up, and then my low self-esteem, and then that that bitch voice shows up again and all these things. But if I'm on track, and like I mentioned yesterday, I was on a call, I'm part of a mastermind group, where like I love when I get in this zone. And it's from the Fearless 44. Like I get in this zone where like I feel like I'm busting on all eight cylinders. My weight's down, I feel good, I'm getting rest, you know, I'm eating right. And and um things, things just, you know, what used to bother me doesn't seem to be such an issue today. Like where I feel like I can just handle life better when I'm not breaking those promises to myself, right? And and why most people quit, okay. Most people don't quit because it's impossible. They quit because it's uncomfortable. Okay. I can't tell you how many times I've put myself in uncomfortable situations, intentionally and unintentionally, right? And I made it, made it just fine. Okay. It takes longer than expected. Always. If you think it's gonna take five minutes, it's probably gonna take an hour. If you think it's gonna take a year, it's probably gonna take three years. Believe me. Okay, I've failed at more things, okay, because I've tried. Not because I quit, but because I tried and I've learned so much from it. And some of them were very expensive lessons that I had to learn. Okay, but I'm here today. And I ain't going anywhere. We're building shit that lasts. Most people quit because they think it's impossible. They quit because it's uncomfortable. I get it. It takes longer than expected. No one notices right away. And this is the funny thing about that. People most people notice before you notice, especially when you're working on yourself. They'll notice long before you notice it. Okay. And they quit for they quit in the the invisible season. Okay, but that's the season where the foundation is built, okay? No one's clapping for you, okay? Maybe they are. We're not doing it for the clap, okay? No one's clapping for you when you get the debt paid off. No one's clapping for you when you go to the gym consistently. No one's clapping for you because you're reading and studying and not scrolling. Okay. No one's clapping for you when you have to have those hard conversations, admitting when you're wrong. Okay. But it's those moments that compound, okay? And one day people will call you lucky. I love that one. It must be nice. It's not luck, it's determination, it's discipline. It's not settling. Okay. And this message is for everybody. Okay. Let me be clear. This isn't a business episode. This is an episode about life. Okay. This applies if you're a parent trying to lead your family better, a young person trying to find direction, a team member who wants more out of life, a leader who who knows, okay, um, knows you um shit. I lost my complete train of thought to errate when that happens. Let me take a sip. Okay. You don't need a title to lead. Okay. You don't need a company to be disciplined. You don't need to own things like a business or anything. You don't need permission to change your life. You just need to decide that average isn't. Acceptable anymore. Okay. I got a hard question, but it's an honest question. Okay. I want you to sit okay and think about this. And I've I've asked this question before, but I'm gonna try to ask it a little different. Okay, what's the hard thing that you've been avoiding that you really know you need to do? You already know the answer. And it might be a conversation, a habit, a boundary, a decision, a commitment. And here's the key part. Okay, this is probably the part that I I forget to mention sometimes. Okay, it do it scared, do it tired, do it imperfection, in imperfect. Okay, but just do it because action creates clarity. I've been stuck and felt like I can't get out of it until I get up out of that seat and I start moving and I start making decisions and I start throwing those weights around and I start taking a long walk and I take that cold plunge or I make that phone call. No matter how frustrating it is, no matter how scared I am, no matter how discouraged I am, when I get out and I start moving, that's when clarity hits. That's when action creates momentum. That's when action creates belief. Okay, I'm still a work in progress. Okay, I'm still learning, I'm still being challenged by this message, okay? But I can tell you this with confidence, okay? But I can't tell you, I wouldn't feel right not telling you. I'm sorry. Every time I've learned, leaned into the hard stuff instead of running from it. My life has gotten better on the other side of it. So, anyhow, I think I'm done running my giblet. If you got anything out of this message, do me a favor. Okay, share this episode with someone who needs it, leave a review or shoot them a text message. Okay. This reminds me of you. Okay. Thank you for listening to Behind the Tool Belf. This is episode 318. Keep showing up, keep raising your standards, and keep doing the hard stuff. Do something epic. Okay. Especially when no one's watching. All right. Till next time. See you on the next episode.

SPEAKER_00: 22:57

Thanks to our sponsors, TC Backer Construction, Hook Roofing Marketing, Rufel, and Project Map It. And thank you for watching. Subscribe to our YouTube channel and follow us on Facebook. We are streaming on all major platforms. See you next week for another episode of Behind the Tool Belt.